Smiling ear to ear... with little bouts of insecurity

There is no denying that I am smitten for this particular man. I feel like things are going good... I am making use of the time we cannot spend together while he has his 7 year old daughter. For any who don't know... my kids are pretty much grown.... so the younger child is something I have a huge respect for.

I made my mistakes with mine. I do not feel any more children need to be subjected to meeting a person, just because their parent fancies them. Fancies can pass... Actual stability and strength and willingness to work at a relationship.... long term (and six months is not long)... once its a true commitment, then its fine to let the kids meet.... I had pondered that notion over the course of the 2 months that I have enjoyed with this sweet man.. I worried a bit.. I had moments where I wonder when is the right time? I figure I will let him determine when its right, it is his child. I also looked up a few articles that touched on that same subject. "Use the calendar, not your heart" is what I had found on one.. it says six months.... wait six months. That was not what I wanted to find... but then I thought about it some more... its true! Honestly, when children meet Daddy's girlfriend, and they break up, they will have problems with trust. It will hamper their future relationships with others. Six months is a worthy spread of time and can go very fast!


One article had a few points to ponder regarding relationships and introducing your kids..These are the signs to tell if the time is right for sure. One is the kiss. If the kiss is not good.... it wont last. Everyone has their own kissing style, therefore, finding one that feels right is important! The sense of humor also needs to match somewhat. The jokes one makes should not make the other feel insulted or hurt. Part of the hurt can be a sure sign of insecurity, which is a dead weight that will kill all involved.... run run run!!! (and yes, I was her a time or two!)
There is an aspect of how it works in the bed as well as walking out in public....are you both walking together, or is one barreling forward, and the other trailing behind... as if the fast one isn't considering that they are "with" the other??? I know there were more points... but I remembered these ones the most... since I have kissed my fair share of frogs... I have been the fast walker, choking the poor guy in my dust.... I have hurt, and been hurt by jokes... and if I had not dealt with extreme insecurity....either mine or someone elses.... I would not understand what they were saying.


I only have little tiny bouts of insecurity these days... I worry that he might not like me as much as I like him. I worry that I may be too fat for him and he might want to keep looking for someone in better shape than I... and when I feel those thoughts infecting my head, I simply remind myself that alone is not bad! I also have a vast ocean out there to cast a net in if He and I do not work out. Why should I fret??? I would rather lose a lover than love a loser! So be it!